Listen, I don't want to come off poorly here, this will be two posts in my last five where I slag Dunkin Donuts, but I am doing nothing more than calling them as I see them or better yet as they happen to me.
As a native Masshole I admit that I must have Dunkin Donuts coffee running thru my veins. I don't know if they put a secret additive in the donuts that get you addicted to the coffee, that way they can start indoctrinating you from a young age. Maybe when Mom is feeding you Muchkins at age 4 you are secretly ingesting slow release compound chemicals that will turn you into a 2 a day Great One drinker. Who knows maybe Dunkin Brands is infiltrating the local water supplys and getting to us that way. What I am saying is I prefer the coffee and quick service to that of Starbucks. Take your venti cup and stick it up your ass. Bring me coffee for the Pink and Orange. Within that past few years there has been quite a change in the average Dunkin employee. Gone are most of the high school kids, and 20 year old pothead antidisestablishment girls with no aspirations, and the old weathered cigarette smoking 50 year old sea hag. Here and now most Dunk's seem to be run by the Brazilian or Puerto Rican or Portugusese coffee cartels. Nothing but broken english speaking guys and girls mostly in their 20's, half prattling on in their native tougue as they as you, "Any donuts or muff" because it is just too hard to finish saying muffin. It seems to be the battle cry if you are just ordering a coffee as I usually do. The respond back, "Any donuts or muff?" You think if you say this phrase 600 times a day you could say the whole word. Muffin. M-u-f-f-i-n!
So this brings me to my situation last weekend. We stop at a Dunkin Donuts that is attached to a Mobil station Boylston, MA. The Dunkins attached to the gas stations can be bad news to begin with but this really takes the cake. So I order a large "milk 2 sugars" as I have a thousand times before. behind the counter is a 50 to 60 year old greenhorn fresh off the boat. I guess the training to step behind the counter at Dunks is a bit lax. Because what did she pour me? A cup of milk with 2 sugars in it!! No coffee at all. Luckily I noticed the cup was cool when I picked it up. I took off the lid and it was pure white! I brought this to her attention. But unfazed she said I wanted "milk a 2 suga" so that is what she gave me. I tried to explain that I wanted the milk instead of cream but that I still wanted coffee... Duh! She seemed perplexed. The 16 kid behind the counter then made my coffee.
Good thing I didn't get back on the road before noticing. I would have been one severly pissed of mofo if I got back in my car and on the highway and opened the lid on the coffee only to find a cup full of sugary milk!
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